Monday, March 30, 2015

Olivia: Week 1 and 2

This post took me a long time to write. It started off as a one week post. Then all of a sudden we were two weeks in. And as much as I hoped to hit publish last Thursday, here it is the following Monday. Maybe the title should be Week 2 and 1/2?

Time flies with a newborn.  I also struggled to put into words all of the emotions and thoughts flowing through me on a daily basis. 

Everything people tell you about becoming a mom is more true than I ever imagined. You really don't know until it happens. There is no preparation for the overwhelming feelings of love and protection the second you hear the first cry and/or see your baby. For me it was a smack in the face in the very first minutes and has only grown stronger with each passing day.  I didn't know my heart could grow so much for my baby, my husband, and my life.

I thought there were some tough times when I was pregnant. Tired, nausea, overall  being uncomfortable 24/7.  Labor is also difficult. My was long and horrible and I would do it all over again to bring Olivia into the world. Having a newborn is also difficult. It is a LOT of WORK.  The whole pregnancy thing seems like a dream come true compared to some of the sleepless nights and tiring days we have experienced in the last two weeks. But surprisingly, here we are all still alive and very much loving each other. 

Our days fly by without me knowing exactly what happened. There are the feedings, the sleeping, and the changings.   Those are a given. The times that stick in my mind though are the little moments. When she grabs my fingers or looks at me with her big blue eyes I couldn't imagine being anywhere else, nor do I want to be anywhere else. And oh when you see the man you love, your partner, love something you both created with as much tender care as you would have, only different in his unique way, I lose it all over again. 

I have had moments when I think about how things will be different; things are different.  Our few outings have taken much longer to prepare for and plan out. I know we won't be able to jump on a train and spend the day in NYC at the last minute but I don't care. 

It is funny how so very different things are today than I ever imagined them to be.  What I thought would be hard is easy and those easy things are at times horribly hard. It's amazing how all of that disappears though with a little snuggle time.

This week is just me and her for the first time. I am both excited and horrified as to what may occur all at the same time.  Just when I feel like we have a routine, a knowledge as to what to do, things get switched up.  First it was the hospital, then it was home with Mr. J and now it is the two of us. Regardless, I know it will be wonderful and any bad things will magically be forgotten in a day, an hour or even minutes after happening.  


  1. This post is so beautiful. Olivia is such a precious little miracle and I can tell how much you love her :)

  2. You will be just fine!!! Your priorities are just right. Enjoy your bonding time with your little princess!

  3. Happy New Baby Olivia! An unusual thing will happen now! Time will literally fly by! The next thing you know she will start turning over, then scooting around the house, then she will want a tricycle! And so it goes!

  4. Ack - got me all teary eyed. Your post is so well written :) Being a mom really is the best thing I've ever done in my life and I absolutely agree with seeing your husband step into those father shoes making you love him more than you thought you could. I have my husband's facial expression when holding each of our kids for the first time burned into my memory. It ALWAYS makes me tear up when I picture it! I can't believe it's already been 2 1/2 weeks for you! But at the same time, I can. I can't believe Mason has been here for 5 already. It's just insane how fast it goes by.

  5. My baby girl is 18 months old now - but you took me right back to those early days... huge hugs mama, many congratulations on the birth of your beautiful girl - soak up all of those moments, and sleep, sleep when you can. :)


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